I been reflectin
While goin through thangs
Emotions heavy
All over the place
Started that letter that I never sent
Only to realize
That I don't forgive
As easily
As I thought that I did
With that being said
Apologies for mistakes that I made
Hearts that I broke
From games that I played
Feelings can flee
A lot can change
In the span of a year or two
See the growth from the pain
Sometimes we need that space
To see with a clearer view
Yo I admit it
I was immature and ego trippin
Thought I knew better
But apparently I didn't
Tryin to be a playa like pops did it
Gotta move outside the Box
That you supposed to fit in
Momma warned me bout it
I didn't listen
Hard-headed
In a world of my own
I fought so hard to forget it
Till I finally did
At least I thought was the case
Until my trauma got triggered
Yo I'm Tryin to do better
It's hard to be unaffected
When u got so much invested
Need a shift in my perspective
How many followers you got
Nah
Where you leading them too
That's a better question
Competing forces
Movin in different directions
Humility vs being thirsty and extra
See that's quite the dilemma
And oftentimes find myself
In the center
And shuttin off
Is my defense mechanism
Sometime easier
To just not deal with it
I'm Tryin to manage my healin
So I don't pass these bad habits
To my future children
Before the world burdens
They optimism
They got they own lessons to learn
I'm tryin to do it different
Yo I be thinkin the worse, everything feel
Like the endin
Guess you gotta destroy
Before you can build again
Everything's Fine