staring at the ceiling Video (MV)

Misinformation
How did I climb to where I'd never make it
Study my patience
They told me I wouldn't ever succeed
Without an education
But times have been changing, so I took a risk
Bet on myself to go farther than this
Let me harness my wit (Witt)
Yeah, I had a vision and built up this house with my fists
I had to venture to places that I couldn't find on a map
Thought I had to sacrifice people I treasured
Cause I was so sure they were holding me back
Thought I was inclined to put blame on the world
And go place my little victim card onto the stack
But that, was the reason I stalled
I didn't push to the limit like Hall
I was fading away (Way)
Convincing myself I was finished
No more collisions, my failures so vivid
I couldn't bare anymore risky decisions
That lead to this
Part time me, part time someone
That is broken all the way to the soul
And unfortunately, the broken one is present when the sun sets
And minuscule thoughts spiral out of control
Man, it's one in morning, staring up at the ceiling
Thinking why I am the reason, for the pain that I deal with
Why do I fail to be blunt when I be sharing my feelings
Is it my inability to uncover the healing
That I know exists (Know exists)
God, I prayed for tomorrow morning
But, now I'm on the fence (On the fence)
Cause, I
Tried to keep it discrete
Yeah, I tried to relax
Didn't want people worry
If they heard I relapsed
Didn't want to be a problem
That they had to attack
I was doing just fine
I was built to adapt
You could say it's a knack
The way I hide my feelings
Been practicing the art
Of no share, concealing
And maybe that's why (That's why)
I'm staring at the ceiling all day alone
Caught in the rubble
After I sat and watched everything crumble
I had presumed, after witnessing tragedy
I'd be prepared when I stepped out the huddle
But I ain't unbuckled
Nothing has changed
Got an unhealthy routine that I've paved
And these habits are harder break when you're already broken
And drowning yourself in your wake
Man, these characteristics of mine
Tell a full story, how twisted am I
Prayed for tomorrow morning like it carried importance
But what did I fix with the time
Nothing, I splurged on my ego and pride
And still spent the hours alone
Eyes on the ceiling, I'm started to wonder
If I'm in a jail or at home
Or maybe they've been intertwined
Maybe my thoughts have been teaching me
I wasn't meant for the climb
Maybe I already stood on the peak
And I'm feeling effects of the sudden decline
Maybe I'm right where I'm meant to be placed
And I just don't know yet
Maybe I need to get out of my head
And start living before it's all over with
Maybe I'm meant to be heard
Wait, destiny's calling my phone
It told me that I'm gonna fly
But the journey will be on my own
So I get a piece of the happiness
But never the feeling of whole
Like having a hold on your heart
But not any clue of the hands on your soul
Cause, I
Tried to keep it discrete
Yeah, I tried to relax
Didn't want people worry
If they heard I relapsed
Didn't want to be a problem
That they had to attack
I was doing just fine
I was built to adapt
You could say it's a knack
The way I hide my feelings
Been practicing the art
Of no share, concealing
And maybe that's why (That's why)
I tried to keep it discrete
Yeah, I tried to relax
Didn't want people worry
If they heard I relapsed
Didn't want to be a problem
That they had to attack
I was doing just fine
I was built to adapt
You could say it's a knack
The way I hide my feelings
Been practicing the art
Of no share, concealing
And maybe that's why (That's why)
I'm staring at the ceiling
Cause, I was open minded
With these open eyelids
But the currents strong
When you sit in silence
Those thoughts are violent
Yeah, check the mileage
This overthinking
Been here a while
It's in my files
Labeled unimportant
Like I label me
When I wake up each morning
And I can't ignore it
It's a constant feeling
When half your days staring at the ceiling
All by yourself (Yourself)