AIlex Supergenius - The Best Pets Lyrics

Cadbury was mean and red
He'd swipe your legs until you bled
The way he terrified poor Tim
We'll always remember him

Then Krimpet entered our world
Our little chirping meatball girl
Her anal glands would kinda stink
But we loved our little krink

Wrigley was our favorite pug
Eating oxtails on the rug
A garbage mouth you would not believe
Hooked on steroids so he could breathe

We got a phantom named Tic Tac
Who loved to mush Alex's neck
He'd try to snuggle with the pug
That's our little tickle bug

Moving to Portland we got lucky
With a little chub we called Cookie
We loved hearing his little snore
That big black blob upon the floor

Then Filbert joined our family
Barks at any dog he'd see
That little nut was heaven sent
Mister ninety nine percent

Then two cute kitties made the scene
First there was lil Jellybean
She's very shy but getting better
I hope someday she'll let us pet her

One more cat you need to know
Is the goofy bean we named Pinto
He can never eat enough
But he's not fat he's just a fluff

Cadbury Krimpet back in the day
Wrigley Tic-Tac hip hip hooray
Oregon gave us Filb and Cookie
Jelly and Pinto complete our family

We love them all, each dog and cat
By now you probably figured that
From New York City to stumptown
They all deserve
A tiny crown