My auntie got cancer
I'm lookin' round, cannot find no answers
Lately I been struggling with the candor
Ugh, I struggle with the candor
My grandma got cancer
So I call her every week to have some banter
I loved her since a youngin', taught me manners
Loved her since a youngin, she got cancer
You took a DNA test, now you that bitch? Oh that's rich
The matriarchs of mine tryna avoid becoming ashes
In plastic
Forgotten, like the shit up in the attic
Focus on the job? man up top my thoughts are static
I'm pissed, in disbelief it happened to the kid
Uncertain on the future and what it will permit
Can't even hug my aunty the chemo it forbids
Can't even kiss my grandma cuz she too far away for this
N shit
My auntie got cancer
I'm lookin' round, cannot find no answers
Lately I been struggling with the candor
Ugh, I struggle with the candor
My grandma got cancer
So I call her every week to have some banter
I loved her since a youngin', taught me manners
Loved her since a youngin, she got cancer
Imma need a hiatus to get me out of this matrix
I know my family need me but I'm stuck out makin' wages
Been bleeding from my savings, steady busy writing phrases
I'm typing up these memos but my heart aint in them pages
I'm fractured from within and my hearts in all these places
My mental beat to shit on my brain got them abrasions
Emotions bottled up and now they breaking from they cages
Can't run from this forever and now I'm running out of spaces
My auntie got cancer
I'm lookin' round, cannot find no answers
Lately I been struggling with the candor
Ugh, I struggle with the candor
My grandma got cancer
So I call her every week to have some banter
I loved her since a youngin', taught me manners
Loved her since a youngin, she got cancer
Flashback
Had a belt around my neck
My mama walked in
Remember i felt like a wreck
Neard demons talkin
We are legion was my soul
Was acting out of control
Had thoughts hectic
Couldn't find shit
Not a self to be known
But bible lessons stuck
A rocky place my seed sown
Trouble taking root
Had to make shit on my own
Now i stick my head in books
Not a belt to be found
Cancer gon cut my life short
Like how it tried to get mom
These days i don't chat
Just stick around me and mine
And speak my truth over hats
Ain't a single throwaway line
Don't step up talking shit
Check yo foot, land mine
Or come at me with the praise
That's good look, now move on
This ain't feel good time
No cinderella story
Ever after
Life f*cks you and moves on
I hope you pardon my malice
Glass house and my shoes gone
A stones throw from collapse
Shards pierce through the callous
Ain't no peace to be known