Anna Livi - Anorexia Lyrics

When skinny tastes better than anything
You'll literally starve for perfection
Recovery doesn't have a day off
I had to learn that the hard way
I was only 10 years old
When 80 pounds became the goal
How could someone be so cold
When weight was nothing I controlled?
At 106 in the 6th grade
All I did was hide in shame
I thought I was overweight
Would have done anything to trade
For a body like the magazines
Anything but my reality
Couldn't face my own reflection
So I taught myself a lesson
Have you ever missed a meal
And everything became so real?
How is thin so damn ideal
When I couldn't even feel?
I didn't want the curvy shape
I just wanted to escape
So I took a chance on fate
Wouldn't even touch a grape
By the time that I was 13
Couldn't even fit in my jeans
Went from a simple size 3
To a size that was way too skinny
I lost more
Than I ever thought I'd lose
I never asked for
A place in anorexia's shoes
It's not worth
The struggle that comes with it
Oh, it's harder
Than I care to admit
It was pounds and pounds ago
That I lost my self control
Even hospitalized
I was too big in my eyes
I was just fading away
Starving myself day by day
Even though 80 pounds felt great
I had lost more than just weight
Sticking fingers down your throat
Is just not the way to go
Could've lost each pound on earth
But I ruined my self worth
This disorder ain't a game
It is not something to play
'Cause it'll leave a scar
On your body and your heart
You've got to know your beauty
Life isn't like the movies
No matter what my size
I finally realized
I lost more
Than I ever thought I'd lose
I never asked for
A place in anorexia's shoes
It's not worth
The struggle that comes with it
Oh, it's harder
Than I care to admit
It was pounds and pounds ago
That I lost my self control
Even hospitalized
I was too big in my eyes
I was just fading away
Starving myself day by day
Even though 80 pounds felt great
I had lost more than just weight