Arkh Zeus - Soleana Lyrics

She was a woman that's like no other
Came from the gutter, her and her mother
No armour for those monsters? No problem
That won't stop her, she'll go harder, so don't bother
Tryna get in between her life or her legs
Unless you got money or work for the feds, preferably the bread
Spent more on drugs than protection instead
This her fourth time fertilizing her egg, will y'all be left for the dead?
That's what you asked the moon
Now look at that, your first love, he came right back to you
Of course you curved that nigga 'cause he still won't pack a tool
Well that's too bad for you
Never left you black and blue just like those other savage dudes
But your time is up, who gon' take care of Luna?
Of course not you, especially not those demons that you just let consume ya
She'll be the sequel of a lost cause fool
Spoken to after her ashes blow in the monsoon
Hola, espero que la persona que ahora
Escucha esto sea mi amada hija, Luna
Si seguiste mis reglas ahora deberías tener 17 años escuchando esta cinta
My name is Soleana, I am 17 years old
I am the mother of the 1 child I brought into this world
Out of the 4 I was pregnant with
It hurts my soul that I can no longer handle being in this world
Not even for you
I want to use this time to tell you a few things about me
You shall be the only one who knows my story
I grew up with horrible parents
When me and my mother moved here from El Salvador
We had even less than what we had to run away from
We were constantly abused by my father and his gang members
Everybody around us was too afraid to help
Coming here made things worse for me
Because my mother was constantly suffering from trauma and took it out on me
I never escaped the abuse
And now my own mother was abusing me more than I ever was
By the time I was 13, I ran away
I had nothing to take with me other than the locket with my name in it
I had no means to survive
All that was on my mind was that I needed to find an escape
Anything that could fill the hole in my heart
That only continued gaping as time moved on and on
I started doing things that I'm not proud to admit
I've slept with many men to keep myself afloat
I did drugs and drank til I couldn't think or feel anything
These men were no different from my parents
They all abused me whenever I became a bother to them
It's like I was just a magnet to the pain I was trying to rid myself of
Your father though, he was a good man
A fool, yes very stupid, but still loved me as much as he could
That's why I had his child
I just wish he didn't give up on me, but I don't blame him at all
I wasn't good to him the way he was to me
Why am I even alive?
Why was I born? Nobody loves me
Nobody understands me or my pain, I don't love me
I regret everything
You're the only thing I don't regret, even though you're a product of my regrets
I want you to understand that I'm only leaving you
Because I know you're special
You're strong enough to get through this life on your own
The way that I couldn't
Wear my necklace with pride, never take it off
That's how you'll learn more about yourself and your powers
Nobody can take that away from you
Don't ever let them know your feelings, your secrets, none of it
I hope you make it past 17
I believe in you
Adios para siempre, mi amor
One last thing
Your real name, it's not Luna
It's Ire