Here I sit, alone
In the middle of the kitchen floor
Blood is still in the sink
I need it to stay, just a bit longer
I cried into the arm of the chair
I stay there, my arm falls asleep
The house is empty
But creaks in the walls
Make me think you're upstairs
And on my side of the bed
In my chair
My back contorts, I am awake
My friends, I let you down again
Please forgive me
I'm not healthy
I clench my teeth
And they shake
What if I grab the glass
And it breaks?
I am afraid of facing
Who I am
Through the mirror
In your eyes
And I don't wanna hold hands
How can I convince myself?
That I can be warm
I can live without your love
Contrary to my signals
My body language
I didn't want you to leave
Oh, I just want to lie you
Down on the table again
I'm still not where I wanna be
Not in an ambulance
But a hospital
I check you in
And there they built machines
So you could breathe
And it all felt complete
When the line went flat
No alarms went off
No cause for concern
This is my nightmare
This is the truth
Clawing at the cliff
What do I have to lose?
I am not asleep
I am very aware of what is happening
I want this to stop