Hole in My <3 Video (MV)

So do I take it in stride?
Cause I am falling apart at the seams
Feel like I'm wasting my life
But I keep it inside
And I hope someday I'll be free

I'm feeling alone
But most days I'm not feeling anything
I lay in bed feeling threatened by all of the lights beating down on me, I bet we
Never will get out this cycle we set up
I feel it's a setup, I never will get up I live in monotony maybe the weekend will let up
So I'll get my head up
I don't wanna run away
But I think that's my only option
I won't take the pills but I'm nauseous
This life is so toxic, I'm not feeling okay
This isn't what I wanted and I know that I just really wanna go back
Tears in my eyes cause this isn't the life that I pictured I finally know that
And I don't blame you I just blame myself
I won't ever ask for help and that won't help my mental health
No
And I don't blame you I just blame myself
Cause I know that I need help
And this pain's the worst I've felt
Oh
And we only go so far
Until we no longer can go on
And these dreams are so damn far
That I feel hopeless, I float along

So do I take it in stride?
Cause I am falling apart at the seams
Feel like I'm wasting my life
But I keep it inside
And I hope someday I'll be free