What is my main mis/sion ? Video (MV)

Can't stop overthinking
What is my main mission?
I talk bunch of nonsense
And somehow they still get it
Shit I've done a lot of things
A person might regret
I've seen too many things
That my mind cannot forget
And I pray up to the lord
Every night before I rest
Hoping I can make it out before I finally stare at death
Directly in his eyes
Cause I do not fear him
There was many times
Where I should've seen him
It wasn't my time
I can say that's for sure
Cause I'm still alive
And that shit I assure
I'm high out my mind
I cannot be sober
I got bunch pain that I can't get over
These drugs didn't help
They just had me coerced
My ex bitch done left me in mid October
Thought I knew her
But I really didn't
Thought I won her
But my shots
I missed them
Thought she loved me
Guess I was delirious
And for her hate
I was the main recipient
She showed me love
I tried to change
I tried to clean my image
Put down the cup
Stoped smoking dank
Tried to quit my addictions
I finally cared
I finally realized
That I have to listen
I finally felt like someone else was figuring out my mission
I finally felt like someone else was figuring out my mission
Lord please forgive 'cause you know that imma keep on sinning