Damnchristian! - Memoirs of a Fried Mind Lyrics

Yeah, this world ain't for me no matter how many doors he had to open
Just to soar deep into my mind's own deformities
Absorbent he is, no yellow and porous
He runs off to explore all the scenery and it conforms to me
Preorder the whores and weed for conformity
Hopefully I'm over these hoarders who keep a hold of these
Potions that'll toast you in motion they making overseas
Reforming the abnormal they administer it orally
Cursed with enormity I'm the citizens vocal feed
Hope we reach a place where my face isn't forcing your machine
To formally abuse your authority for some more money
Getting ornery on the mic like what is this sorcery?
Aurally picture the strange fixtures surrounding most of these people
Loaded with more fatigue for having their priorities
Normalcy is fixing a forgery of an older scheme
Formerly known as the torturing of all society
My sobriety has been giving me some anxiety
And all of this psychiatry ain't really f*ckin helping
But this rap shit's my diary which is why I'm so fiery in so much of my rhymes
Cause these times fading so damn fast
F*ckin made it at last, shouldn't I be somewhat happy?
Put my baggage on a caddy, I finally feel I'm at peace
With the shit that happened back before I realized what crappy f*cking shit
I was entrapped in at the time, but f*ck it, oh well
Old hell, same old heaven, guess which one of them's beckoning me to jump head in?
F*cking plagued with deafening
Screams of all the men that's walked the f*ckin path of Armageddon
Known as manic and depressive 'slike a mental repossession
The devil's got a weapon and he's charging for me telling me
I motherf*ckin broke the lease, how the f*ck I know that he's
Tryna take control of me, as I'm getting old and weak
I see this world was born for me, yeah
Everyone's a motherf*ckin victim of the times
Everything relates to the position of the mind
Everyone's just tryna f*ckin fish for different signs
But it's so hard to tear apart the f*ckin shit from the good times
I mean this shit just isn't fine, but I keep telling myself
That I'm just headed for the wealth but I really just want my well-
Being to soar so f*ckin high that I feel like I'm on cloud nine again
Wonder how my time was spent, cause f*ck I don't remember
Man I try holding together but can't just manage
To sever the bonds holding my old self to my current, like was it worth it?
I got clean like detergent but now I feel like I'm serving no purpose
Thanks to the words in my head, it keepin on turning
Again and again I'm learning my lesson but it's too early for me to be this discerning
But don't give a f*ck bout who I'm hurting
That attitude got me madly screwed, I have to do some f*ckin laps
And choose my path cause I can't ask of you
I always act a fool ever since I had to stay after school
Because I packed a bowl or two in the mo'f*ckin locker room
Thought I lost it too many times so I saw a doctor
Two thousand mo'f*ckin sessions my mind remains so unconquerable
So I sit in darker rooms writing rhymes so impossible that they think
I'm an artist too deep in my own damn thoughts to move
But they know I'm on the move ever since I was probably two cause
My hyper ass often do too much moving to sit still
Think it ain't no big deal, think it don't hurt it will
You end up on a steep hill tryna climb it just to be filled
With the pressure and fatigue, the drop of self esteem and the depression
Getting steeper got you begging on your knees
For forgiveness for the things that you done said to all these people
That are trying just to keep you out your own inflated ego
Damn, I can't see through sometimes, please don't let me go
Even though I do evil shit I'm just climbing a deep hole
Please don't let it be lethal