You make a couple bad decisions
And then you find yourself in jail
What started as a night of fun
Became an epic fail
I was walking printers alley
Just looking for some food
And maybe even a drink or two
To change my attitude
You see beer makes me cheerful
Wine makes me tearful
Gin makes me reminisce
Rum makes me lazy
Tequila makes me crazy
That's one thing you can't miss
Now life is a journey
And I've got an attorney
Appointed just for me
And the judge said that his only job
Is to cure my allergy
Cause tequila makes me break out,
Break out of my shell
Tequila makes me break out
And raise a little hell
Tequila makes me break out
Break out sure enough
Sometimes it makes me break out
In hand cuffs
Now, beer might make me happy
And wine might make me cry
But tequila makes me crazy
That's one thing I can't deny
Well, I'm no philosopher
But honest ossifier
I'm not as think
As you drunk, I am
Your a stand up fella
Don't harsh my mellow
I'm doing the best I can
I cant touch my nose
Or reach my toes
Or walk your crooked line
I can tell you what I need right now
That's a shot, some salt, a lime
You see beer makes me cheerful
Wine makes me tearful
Gin makes me reminisce
Rum makes me lazy
Tequila makes me crazy
That's one thing you can't miss
Now life is a journey
And I've got an attorney
Appointed just for me
And the judge said that his only job
Is to cure my allergy
Cause tequila makes me break out,
Break out of my shell
Tequila makes me break out
And raise a little hell
Tequila makes me break out
Break out sure enough
Sometimes it makes me break out
In hand cuffs
So pick your poison wisely
And try to take it slow
Just remember what the Bible says
You only reap the seeds that you sow
Pay attention to my story
It's a precautionary tale
If you drink too much tequila
You might just wake up In jail....
You see beer makes me cheerful
Wine makes me tearful
Gin makes me reminisce
Rum makes me lazy
Tequila makes me crazy
That's one thing you can't miss
Now life is a journey
And I've got an attorney
Appointed just for me
And the judge said that his only job
Is to cure my allergy
Cause tequila makes me break out,
Break out of my shell
Tequila makes me break out
And raise a little hell
Tequila makes me break out
Break out sure enough
Sometimes it makes me break out
In hand cuffs
Yes sometimes it makes me break out....
In handcuffs!
I'll drink to that!!!