Erin Johnson - PTSD Lyrics

I really should have known
But in my mind I thought I was getting better
I thought I was beginning
Beginning to heal
The wounds so deep
Too numb to feel

I need to move on
Why can't I move on
The cycle so deep it's my identity
I'm fighting how I know
But I don't really know
My heart will never make It out alive
How can I make it out alive
I really want to make it out alive

I'm liable to change
Suddenly violently
I have a hair trigger
I hate the fact that he
Can say a word
And now I'm on the floor and barely breathing

I need to move on
Why can't I move on
The cycle so deep
It's my identity
I'm fighting how I know
But I don't really know
My heart will never make It out alive
How can I make it out alive
I really want to make it out alive

I'm raw and I'm depleted
I'm struggling
Chronically
Facing life alone
Without capacity
To hope or dream
While flashbacks keep me Here
And hold me hostage

I need to move on
Why can't I move on
The cycle so deep it's my identity
I'm fighting how I know
But I don't really know
My heart will never make it out alive
How can I make it out alive
I really want to make it out alive

We'll hold your hope until
You heal, we are
Beside you
Even if you can not see us
Someday maybe you'll see the beauty we see
Your past will shrink into
A distant memory

You need to move on
Why can't you move on
The cycle so deep
It's your identity
You're fighting how you know
But you don't really know
Your heart will never make it out alive
I want to make it out alive
How can I make it out alive