Well it seems as I've been turned to
In such a terrible twist of fate
To live my life a hatchet man
In so many awful ways
This campground its been lived in
And these people need to eat
So trust me it's not personal
I'm just trying to make ends meet
So with one boot in the stirrup
And one spur on the horse
You'd think by now she'd need no help
In keeping on the course
But its never been a life that I've been proud of
Some have found a way to do it dry
In five days I'll be measuring gunpowder
And my blistered hands won't even have to try
All the cities that I run through
All the people that I meet
Tend to greet me with a concern
They don't know that I can see
Despite all you have heard
Rough living sets you free
Trust my gut more than my vision
Acquired survival instinct
And the stars I'm sleeping under
Aren't as endless as they say
The dirt cradles my filthy hair
In all but a sweet way
But its never been a life that I've been proud of
Some have found a way to drink it dry
In a few nights I'll be checking that gunpowder
And these lonely eyes won't know enough to cry
Guess redemption don't come easy
When you're left standing all alone
And all those heartless acts I've done
Have left my heart so Goddamn cold
The truth was what I sought
I saw some really ugly things
Any war I'd ever wagered
Never solved a Goddamn thing
With one foot six foot under
And the other in a hearse
You'd think by now I'd learned enough
To seal away this curse
But its never been a life that I've been proud of
I never found a way to do it dry
Last night I saw some flashes smelled gunpowder
And I didn't get to choose the way I'd die
Because I shut out anyone that meant a damn thing
Snuffed out any flame that held a chance
Made my peace the moment that I said I loved you
And did my best to keep us safe from them
No it's never been a life that I've been proud of
Knowing now I won't survive the night
You were lonesome full of heartache those last hours
Not knowing how truly hard I tried
I was caught up in my own sense of the right way