Gnedds & Brian Richard Griffin - Searching 2 Lyrics

It can be so close and remain unnoticed
So imminent and invisible to us
But that doesn't mean it's not there just because you can't see it

Aye, sittin' in my studio, where the goody go?
Laid with the serpents, now I'm on a roll
Now let's walk back where I used to go
They all loved me, but did they really though?
I used to spend all of my nights alone
I was thinking when do I get to go?
I was walking, I was all alone
Didn't have a place that I could call a home
I've been fighting for my own soul
Wonderin where did the faith go?
I've been walking on a thin road
I've been hanging by a thin rope
There's a lot of pain
I don't know how to cope
So I put it on a page, man, I don't know
Through the dark days and the dark nights
Still I lay awake, in my bed and think

Tossing and turning, wonder if it's worth it
The pain that I cause for the pleasure I steal
I was born a slave and the chains that are round me are holding me down
Man I wanna break down I need healing
I'm not sure they'll find this appealing
Cause who am I?
Just a guy tryna find purpose inside his readings and his teachings
I'm talkin with God late at night
Praying that I could find the light
I'm just searching for something that could feed me
Teach me how to live for everlasting life, yeah
Who would've ever thought
That the itty-bitty boy who was running from the monsters inside of his head
While getting beat down by the peers that he had
He would become a man that the demons would dread
I'm sitting all alone while Satan threw stones
Praying to God, man I wanna go home
Bout to end it all I can't take it anymore
Fighting myself, trying to even the score
Hit my man up and said
"How do I know? If God is with me or did he let me go?"
I've spent my whole life hoping that I'd find a home
He said that lights are meant to shine the most when they're alone

Maybe we are missing the redeeming power of God
Because we are searching in the wrong places

I've been so without God
Detached but my doubts on my back
Keep me tracked to a fate coming at me
And I'm tied to what that means
Every day wishin every living being
Either leave or they'd help me
Either way they don't know what I feel when I write these
Typings show me I'ma my friends from my enemies
From all the times they forget to show that they "loved" me
But to me that's reality
They don't really care 'bout life till it's you versus you
And a knife to your throat
But you hate that you won't
Cause of joy that you hope hasn't ended
Maybe it gets better in the end
But I guess even then
All the searching that you tend to pursue and defend
Is causing more problems than what you had when you began