[ Featuring the Fridge Doors ]
Oh Crispy Seaweed
Why are you lying to me?
Oh Crispy Seaweed
Don't you know I can see?
I know you'll lettuce know
When you're ready to
Show the world
And you're still perfect to me
(Despite you're name being faulty)
I'm having trust issues with crispy seaweed
(He's having trust issues)
Even though it always satisfies my needs
Is it savage
(Is it savage)
To hate that you're cabbage?
Oh Crispy Seaweed
Tell us no more lies
Oh Crispy Seaweed
I still want you with my egg fried rice
But you're faulty
In title only
Cos you're sweet and salty
Like I want you to be
Oh I might have you for my tea
(But you're still lying to me)
I'm having trust issues with crispy seaweed
(He's having trust issues)
Even though it always satisfies my needs
You're pretty average
(So so average)
Since I've found out you're cabbage
Now I'm in doubt
(He's in doubt)
Won't ever feel the same
Can't work it out
(He can't work it out)
Why would you lie about your name?
I feel like a fool
Instead of you I might order some chicken balls
(Chicken noise)
I'm having trust issues with crispy seaweed
(He's having trust issues)
Even though it always satisfies my needs
You've done real damage
(So much damage)
By being cabbage
No you may be thinking why isn't this track more Orientally inspired
After all the food I'm singing about is often associated with the Chinese cuisine
Well I'm here to change that with the help of a musician friend of mine
Who's here to play the traditional Chinese instrument the erhu
The only problem is he's from Leicester and has never played one before
Take it away Niall Turner
I'm having trust issues with crispy seaweed
(He's having trust issues)
Even though it always satisfies my needs
How can I manage
(How can he manage)
Now I know you're cabbage?
