Kingsmere X - I Don't Know Lyrics

At night I gaze upon the
Star-like tiles on my ceiling
And I wonder if I'm truly
Destined to be all alone
For a reason I don't know I
Just cannot quite shake this feeling
That this bitter solitude is
No one's fault except my own
So I roll over and over
Till the sunshine brings me back to the sobering
Reality that I am everything I always told myself I
Wouldn't ever be who I was today
So I'm hating and I'm laying in my bed alone
And everything starts to feel like the cold and unknown
Void of space where I'm keeping the pace of
Staying in the place where I face every moment I've faced

I'm sick of being so alone
Desperate to meet someone I know
Who doesn't know the things I know
Will turn the yes's into no's
Hey you, I love you, no I don't
I hate you, no I don't I don't
Know how I feel when I
See you outside of my phone
So compose a text take a moment to
Consider the location of the
Dots, ellipses, cases, closing
Statements, bitter faces and the
Thoughts to prove my point you know I'm
Wrong I know I'm right so write the
Wrongs and fight the fight in spite of
Spite in light of all the light we've lost

And if you ask me what is
Wrong with me I'll tell you
I don't know cause I don't know what's wrong with
Me I wish you didn't have to ask
I don't know who I wanna be and
I don't know who I care to be and
I don't know the first thing
About the way I am

Here I go in a party hat
All dressed up in my head and I step up to bat
It's a swing and a kiss and a laugh and a miss
As I ink up my wrist with a motto that
Let's me know its ok to forget I'm alone
I'll be living the dream if the dream is to show
I don't know what I want but I'll give it a go
Though it ends like it does every time I have hope
Every time I get a bit of booze I'm being a bub
Every night unlit I'm losing and I'm leaving a love
Everyday I quit I'm cruising and I'm queasy because
Every now and then it's over but I'm gonna say yup
And if I never ever be the one I said I would be
I'll be looking at the choices and it's easy to see
Where I had driven off the road or I fell out of a tree
I don't know what I'm looking at but I know it's me

And if you ask me what is
Wrong with me I'll tell you
I don't know cause I don't know what's wrong with
Me I wish you didn't have to ask
I don't know who I wanna be and
I don't know who I care to be and
I don't know the first thing
About the way I am

And if you ask me what is
Wrong with me I'll tell you
I don't know cause I don't know what's wrong with
Me I wish you didn't have to ask
I don't know who I wanna be and
I don't know who I care to be and
I don't know the first thing
About the way I am