Everyday I wake up
And I thank God
I just have some pet peeves
I'm not so fond of
Except these aren't my pet peeves
They're my Instagram followers
Not clearing the time left on the microwave (Why wouldn't you reset that?)
And that implies they took the meal out prematurely (Your food's gonna be cold now)
Another thing I don't like is when I don't have strawberry ice cream (Although, I'd rather have real strawberries)
Or when I come to an empty rice cooker (I don't actually own a rice cooker)
People that talk to me when I'm wearing headphones (Dude, I'm wearing headphones right now)
Why are you talking to me? Can't you see I'm wearing headphones? (I'm busy)
I'm trying to listen to One Direction (Just kidding, that's not what I listen to)
I listen to real shit like the Finding Nemo soundtrack
People not using their blinkers when turning (How am I supposed to know which way you're going?)
People who merge onto the highway at 40 mph (I'm not a mind reader)
People who meow without context (Slurp)...Meow
Man, you guys really hate other people
People that take up an entire sidewalk (I'm trying to walk, you're in my way)
Walking as slowly as humanly possible (Pick it up, pick up the speed)
When people are fake friends, I will ghost them (Boo)
When people eat really loud, especially if you're eating something like a sauce cause then I can hear your lips smacking, and I really don't want to hear that
When people don't know where countries are located
But it's not their fault, 8th grade social studies class failed them
Really old pianos that need tuning
But you gotta admit, there's a certain charm to it
Something out of key can be beautiful
You can be beautiful
Something out of key can be beautiful
You can be beautiful
Something out of key can be beautiful
You can be beautiful
Something out of key can be beautiful
You can be beautiful
Something out of key can be beautiful
You can be beautiful