Mathis - Gone Lyrics

They ask me what it's like when you just wanna die?
I tell them can't stand cause there's pain in my sides
I tell them need chains so I don't fall at night
I tell them nothing matters for as long as I'm alive
I could never die, no I'm not able
But I'm too weak to eat the food that's on the table
You expect me to jump when I can't f*ckin stand?
I know there's more to life but right now nothings planned
I hate jokes, I hate comedy, I hate all that I love
Cause when I'm stuck in bed I simply cannot give a f*ck
I hate music, I hate theatre, I hate myself and I want death
But I know I'm f*ckin worth it so can't do it for respect
Every fear and regret swarms around in my head
And I don't think it stops even if I am dead
Anxiety, it swarms me like the I hit the bee's nest
Stinging in my left arm, I can never get rest
So my regrets turn into threats because I'm wishing for my death
So I'll have to cut myself until I realize nothings left
Because she left and now I'm left with every second that we spent
That's f*cking up my head so I'm not jack, I'm possessed

And I'm gone
Please move on
I'll float up
It's enough
And I'm gone
Please move on
I'll float up
It's enough

On the edge of the cliff, pebbles fall as I wish
For eternal abyss that lies at the bottom of the lake
So I pray for a day when the rocks give away
And I'm standing at the edge and I just lose weight
Free falling through the sky I really feel so alive
Flashes through my eyes, the beauty that is life
Spins around my mind, like my arms when in the wind
I can almost see the trees, my journey can't begin
Because I'm no longer a threat for your futile existences
Cause luckily I can't wake up when falling from these distances
I see the trees surround me, finally I'm free at last
But I regret the moment that I jumped when I feel my last crash