Nathan Harms - Escape Lyrics

I know you're worried
Wrote Depressed and Worthless
People tell me that I'm worth it
I hate that song
I wanna make it in music
But that isn't why I do it
I go through tons of pain
And this is how I get through it
I use it as an outlet
A stress reliever
Pain killer
If music is a drug
Then I'm the addict and the dealer
Up all night
I might overdose
I don't smoke
But this song is so dope
Takes my mind off all my stress
Yea this is how I cope
You tell me that you understand but I know that you don't
You tell me that you understand but I know that you don't
You tell me that you understand but you don't even know
You tell me that you understand but you don't even know
How can you know
This music is how I escape
It gets me through all the pain
I always have these days
Where I'm depressed and debate
If my life is worth it
Might give God my soul to take
If I'm gonna live to see another day
I gotta persevere through all this pain
Music's something I need to create
It's my escape
My superhero with no cape
My life has no meaning but it can still be saved
It's my escape
It's my escape
My escape
My escape
My escape
Don't see the point anymore
Gonna keep pushing
But my life feels like a chore
My life is a boat and I wanna go overboard
Sinking fast
Don't do lines of crack
But I create these lines that are hard to digest
Took years before people learned I was depressed
Fake it so well
Don't want them to learn of my stress
Say I need a therapist but that's not coming next
Life is a book so quit writing more text
A world with no music is a world where I'm dead
If I can't escape the pain, the floor will turn red
Only thing that's stopping me is people in my family going to my room to see that I am now deceased
I don't need them to bury me
They aren't worth abandoning
I act selfish, but I'm selfless
I'm helpless
Music is the only thing that's helped this
If I'm gonna live to see another day
I've gotta persevere through all this pain
Music's something I need to create
It's my escape
My superhero with no cape
My life has no meaning but it can still be saved
This music is how I escape
It gets me through all the pain
I always have these days
Where I'm depressed and debate
If my life is worth it
Might give God my soul to take
If I'm gonna live to see another day
I've gotta persevere through all this pain
Music's something I need to create
It's my escape
My superhero with no cape
My life has no meaning but it can still be saved
It's my escape
It's my escape
My escape
My escape
My escape
When you were diagnosed with cancer
I knew I had to find an answer
To this question that needs answering
How can I escape the pain that I'm wrestling
Restless
I couldn't even sleep
The thoughts of losing you were just too deep
Every night I was in the bathroom wishing it was me
Asking God, "Why?" before demanding me takes me
I haven't done night right
Throughout my whole life
So why do good people suffer when there are bad people that deserve to die like me
I wanted cancer to kill me instead of hurting you
Please God
Give me the pain that she's going through
Make me suffer so that she doesn't have to
Had vivid images of you in your grave
Didn't want that reality
So I always prayed
Though I knew you were saved
A world without you just don't feel safe
I'm sorry for not doing nothing right
Maybe that's the reason I deserve to die
Then you can live your life
Mines not worth living anyway
So many things go wrong every day
Now this is spreading through your body
So my depressions getting worse
Now I have to worry about putting my mom in a hearse
I don't wanna have to deal with that
Lord, let me go first
She's battled depression and cancer
Lord, help her find a cure
My pain doesn't even compare to her's
I wish you had an escape
A place to go when your feeling pain
Feel like a thief
It seems I took this from you
I try to keep it real
But don't know what you go through
Don't know how it feels to feel the way that you do
Wish I could take it all away and die a death you shouldn't have to
I, I, I should've been the one that got cancer
I should've been the one that has to suffer every single day
Not you
Cause you're a great person
I'm, I always feel like I'm not
I wish that I had to suffer so that you did not have to
Cause you don't deserve it and I do
You don't deserve to go through any of the stuff that you have to go through
I should have to go through that
And I wish that I could
I wish it was me and not you
Cause it worries me so much that you go through all that stuff and I don't have to
Because I should be the one that goes through it
And not you