When I pissed a perfect rainbow
And aced every drug screen
I needed help so I called up this skinhead
Lisa Brownlie's old boyfriend, Noah Levine
He had a place against the stream and he's a punk from Santa Cruz
A Buddhist with a Jewish name, how could I ever lose?
He'd give me a bro rate and a triple AAA discount
If I checked in to his mansion and paid the right amount
Getting clean in seven days sounded pretty good
In a gentrified hipster neighborhood
They told me my addiction wouldn't be too hard to fix
What they didn't tell me was about day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
The guy who searched through all my things was that producer, Jim Goodwyn
I giggled 'cause he missed my two-milligram strip of Suboxone
He said, "This isn't funny Big Mike, this is serious detox"
I said, "I'm laughing because your hand was inside one of my jerk off socks"
My semi-private room smelled like rubbing alcohol
So, I wore a leather blindfold and a latex camisole
Two days later, when I woke up, I was in such a good mood
'Cause I was three days clean and on Tuesday nights, they serve Mexican food
I never tried to quit drugs or hang out with Buddha before
But after four or five days, I had no urge to score
I thought I kicked ass on the narcotics
But then I woke up as a toilet on day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
F*ck day six
Day six can suck my dicks