Pxckets - Sorry For Being Me Lyrics

I know there's some things that I need to fix
I hope you hear me out when I'm saying this
I'm better off rotting in the bottom of a ditch
If the reapers gonna take me then it better be quick
I hate myself I hate this life I don't know what's next
This time was pain but what is coming next?
Next thing you know I'm speaking right to death
But don't worry about me cuz I know its for the best
I know there's some things that I need to fix
I hope you hear me out when I'm saying this
I'm better off rotting in the bottom of a ditch
If the reapers gonna take me then it better be quick
I hate myself I hate this life I don't know what's next
This time was pain but what is coming next?
Next thing you know I'm speaking right to death
But don't worry about me cuz I know its for the best
I punish myself with the guilt of my actions
I do not sleep cuz its turned to a habit
I fight with my demons cuz they keep on laughing
Take so many pills I don't know what's happening
I want to be numb I'm so sick of the pain
Its getting so bad its messing with my brain
Even on sunny days it always rains
I hunger for death because no peace remains
I'm stuck in a cycle I cant make it out
My mind is so f*cked and I'm filled up with doubt
Trust issues, insecure, demons about
Ill never find love cuz I always strike out
One to many times I've lost my way
One to many times I wished I could fade
I'm sorry I'm me I would change any day
But for now I'm stuck in my f*cked up ways
I wish I could change I wish you could see
I struggle with death i don't wanna be me
I wish I could fade so I can be free
From all of this pain from just being me
Why do I do this I'm asking myself
I go through the torture of my mental health
I feed into pain I don't reach out for help
Cuz i don't deserve it if you couldn't tell
I'm sorry for being me I'm trapped in a cage
I'm feigning for death its always been that way
I start hating myself more and more everyday
I don't wanna be me I just want to be saved
The devil is wanting to snatch up my soul
The more that I hurt the more I get cold
All of this pain has been getting real old
I just wish I could change who I am as a whole
I know there's some things that I need to fix
I hope you hear me out when I'm saying this
I'm better off rotting in the bottom of a ditch
If the reapers gonna take me then it better be quick
I hate myself I hate this life I don't know what's next
This time was pain but what is coming next?
Next thing you know I'm speaking right to death
But don't worry about me cuz I know its for the best
I know there's some things that I need to fix
I hope you hear me out when I'm saying this
I'm better off rotting in the bottom of a ditch
If the reapers gonna take me then it better be quick
I hate myself I hate this life I don't know what's next
This time was pain but what is coming next?
Next thing you know I'm speaking right to death
But don't worry about me cuz I know its for the best