Run4mok - Told You Once Lyrics

I'm telling you once, not telling you twice
Socialising makes me sick but I'm way too nice
It's no surprise that I may be sick from the ways I write
Divide my life into all of these songs
But it multiplies all of my problems
Never does solve them feels like I never do right
Chasing the image of family that I never got
Wasting percentage of energy into every drop
Tap in to personal trauma like it's a faucet
Run it when I'm flowing and now want to turn it off shit
Songs hit hard but I'm happier than ever when it softens
Probably only time I ever talk about my heart then
I'm honest, I'm authentic, I'm exhausted
Only time you'll ever see me lying's in a coffin
Chasing relief from the thoughts that creep in
Hollow when I get sleepy then I'm off the deep end
Complacent, getting better isn't in my reach yet
But face it, I think I never will cause I haven't found peace yet
And I've been searching
Trust me you will if you haven't been hurt yet
Think I'm bad now?
I ain't even at my worse yet
My life is a show and they want me drawing curtains
But I don't really think I'm evil or I'm a bad person
I hear no, speak no, see no worth in
Saying what I feel when they don't care much
Down playing what I feel so I'm not a sore thumb
I've always been a nervous kid
Naive, ignorant but bliss
The boy never had a pot to piss
But look what a purpose did
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you
Chasing respect cause I need validation
Chasing regret cause I'm never complacent
Wasting my breath if I really tried explaining
What I'm going through on a day to day basis
Lost so many people
I don't remember reasons
I don't remember caring at the time
But now I'm facing disaster
Everywhere I go cause I change with the seasons
Always do my best doing the worst when betrayed, shit
I don't know love but feel myself again
Tears drop on the page when I grace the pen
When I laugh so hard that it ain't pretend
When I smile and it makes a dent
I'm chasing the feeling we had back then
We all going through it but doing it as friends
Chasing the way I felt when I ran
Away from the problem but I don't think I can
All I do is wreck shit
I never had direction
I'm okay as long as I move forward but misstepped it
I cried when I talked about Anthony, I vented
When I said I'm sorry to my mother, man I meant it
I don't mean to be cold
It's just so hard trying to fake a smile for people
I ain't been okay since a kid
I'm always anxious
Instead of growing up, my old self I was chasing
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you twice
I told you once
Not telling you twice