So Sorry - A Coward Dies a Thousand Deaths (and I'm Dying to Live Just Once) Lyrics

To have and hold
A terminal
Affliction
Of affection
I've choked on words enough
To know it in my gut
I'd only botch it up

A coward dies a thousand deaths
And I'm dying to live just once
Seems like everyone I see is alive but me
And I'm begging to live just once
One time

When I speak
My dumb words define the
Rest of me
What you see
Is some bastard design of
The rest of me

Isn't it insane
How our minds can be enslaved
By sensations of the heart?
And isn't it absurd
How our perceptions can usurp
The truth of who we are?
Starting from that age
When your sex-drive is engaged
Your mind never strays too far
From that adolescent fright
Of another lonely night
And how vulnerable you are

Sweet dreams
To my identity
You're only
What you're seen to be
A bad scene
Always to follow me

I was gasping for air
Hoping anyone would hear
And I choked on silence again
I was begging the question
"Am I even really here?"
And I choked on silence again
Again