Ok so I can be a little shy
But my mom says I need friends
So I came over to say hi
I'd shake your hand but you wouldn't wanna shake mine
Cuz my palms get kinda sweaty and you seem like a cool guy
You ask "whats up" I respond "nothing" cut and dry
And now I'm kicking myself cuz thats not much of a reply
Ask myself what I'm doing here only God knows why
Shouldn't have smoked before I came I get antisocial when I'm high
Maybe I should get a cat dealing with people is too hard
But I can barely care for plants I'll just get me some Bacardi
Go up to the counter and the lady doesn't card me
I aint getting any younger still ain't invited to no ones parties
See I heard people change after they get out of school right
But I'm still wearing my same khakis get myself to bed at 9
And I know that I don't have to but its the way I live my life
Besides if I'm late I don't get my kiss goodnight
Anyway, I forgot, where was I
Oh yeah introducing myself god maybe I should lie
Wanna see a party trick? I can make an object fly
I aint been this nervous since the dance in junior high
Oh shit I didn't mean to, oh god, was that your eye
I'm not seeing any blood but I can go get you some ice
Tell your girlfriend to back off I'm just trying to be nice
All I wanna do is help heaven knows I can't fight
Can't we all just calm down this is no big deal right
Do you really disagree? I had a feeling that you might
My heart is beating faster who's dimming out the lights
How the hell'd it get to this, i just wanted to say hi
I just slipped and fell, no really I'll be fine
Did they say I fainted? No really thats a lie
And no mom I didn't pickup any guys
It doesn't count when they bring you home in an ambulance ride
I'm a big girl now of course I didn't cry
You don't need to tuck me in but my mouth is kinda dry
Would you bring me some warm milk, you know the way I like
And before you leave don't forget to turn on the night light
I think I learned my lesson I should just stay inside
I feel much safer here those people woulda eaten me alive
Now that I'm looking back I'm lucky I survived
Next time I'll stay home watch some movies and get high.