Todd Snider - Handleman's Revenge Lyrics

They named that goddamn kiss-ass Handleman
Vice President of Human Resources or something
He stood up and made a speech about how
We would all have to work even harder now
I thought, Harder now, harder at what?
I would give up anything to get up and walk out of here, but

I'm stuck on the corner of sanity and madness
I'm looking them over, I can't see a difference
Making money out of paper, making paper out of trees
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe

You ought to hear the shit that I get from my daughter
She says that she can't stand the sight of the car I bought her
I ruined her life forever, she don't ride a ragtop
Her and her mother spend my money pretty much nonstop
They're trying to break me for the sake of the neighborhood
They want everybody up and down the street to think we're doing good

We're stuck on the corner of sanity and madness
Looking them over, I can't see a difference
Making money out of paper, making paper out of trees
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe

I didn't even want to study economics
My parents made me because they said it would be practical
I can't make my kid do a goddamn thing I tell him to
That kid's an unrepentant radical
He is as unimpressed by these plaques in my cubicle
As I am secretly impressed with his ability
To look at everything so completely irresponsibly

I'm stuck on the corner of sanity and madness
I'm looking them over, I can't see a difference
We're making money out of paper, making paper out of trees
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe

You know now I have to call that little pecker Mr. Handleman
Drove home from work as mad as I had ever been
And then I nearly jerked that kid out of a drive-thru window
He said Will that be everything? I said Hey, what would you know?
You're looking at a man about to buy his kid a ragtop
What are you driving, a bicycle, you little punk?

I'm stuck on the corner of sanity and madness
I'm looking them over, I can't see a difference
We're making money out of paper, making paper out of trees
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe
We're making so much money we can hardly breathe