Our disease, our disease
Our disease, our disease
Our disease, our disease
Is scurvy, scurvy, scurvy
Scu, scurvy
Which is a lack of vitamin C disease
That occurs when your body gets no citrus
It killed a bunch of old-timey sailors, argh
Complications caused my scurvy may affect
Your teeth
Your skin
Your teeth
Your blood cells
Teeth
And bones
Among others
Scurvy can be difficult to diagnose
Because its symptoms often those of
Other ailments
The most distinctive sign of scurvy is
A really bad case of
Gum disease
Which occurs in many
But not all cases
Of scurvy
Scurvy
Scurvy
Scu
Scurvy
Our disease, our disease
Our disease, our disease
Our disease, our disease
Is fasciolosis
Fasciolosis
Which is a condition caused by an infection
From a parasitic flatworm
It's a microscopic foe
It's a tiny little bug
Found in watercress, my friends
That's a slightly bitter green
Which my father really loved
A watercress fanatic
He ate it by the bushel
Oh, our disease will make your tummy burn like lava
Also, my father had diarrhea
Delia told me all about his diarrhea
They laugh
Daddy was in pain
Agonizing pain
His hiney wasn't well
Itchy and unwell
People need to know
What could be squirming inside their food
So our disease is fasciolosis
Fasciolosis
And now we'll take that A
Our disease, our disease
Our disease, our disease
Is my disease
My disease
Which is an incredibly rare
Genetic disorder
In which several signs of aging
Are manifested at a very early age
Some symptoms may include
Uh-oh
Wrinkled skin, stiff joints, hip dislocation
Wah-wah
Atherosclerosis
This was a-
Molecular degeneration
-terrible idea!
Hypertension
Look at how they're looking at me
Presbycusis
Like I'm a slide, I'm a chart
I'm a freak on display
Cardiac issues
Exhibit A
And general failure to
Well, what about exhibit B?
You wanna know what I see?
Your disease is a bad case of adolescence
Accompanied by anxiety
Peer pressure
Bruised egos
And an over-concern about a science grade
About football games
About who's getting laid
Who's got a zit
Who's doing what
Who gives a shit?!
Your disease is a tough one, that's for sure
Getting older is my affliction
Getting older is your cure
Getting older is your cure
But for me, there is no cure
Few people with my disease
Live longer than sixteen years
And-
I just turned sixteen!
So happy birthday!
My disease!
Oh my, my, my, oh, my disease!
An incredibly rare genetic-
Hotcha!
Disorder!
Pew!