Mammalian Sighing Reflex Album Lyrics by Wilbur Soot

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Amazon Standing Lamp

Hi, it's been a while
Oh, I could stop on by
I wonder if you'll hear this when I'm done
It's gonna be a lot more 'til I'm gone
Waste inside my mind
Bloodshot eyes and empty sheets
It's all downhill, 2013
Ostentatious, Austin, Texas
I get so drunk I can barely see
Hit me now before this gets too cute
Don't make me beg in this hotel room
You'd think it'd get a lot easier without you

But you were right
There's so much shit inside my mind
I must confess the second time
A lot of friends have left my life
Escaping my tractor beam of woe
One small kiss and off they go
Crying in deep vibrato

Midday missionary
Late night loathing
Midnight cowgirl
Morning smoking

Me and my girl could go all night (midday missionary)
My girl's the world, she f*cks my life (late night loathing)
A top-heavy Amazon standing lamp's (midnight cowgirl)
The only light left in my life
A top-heavy Amazon Basics standing lamp's (midday missionary)
The only light left in my life

No, it's not you again, is it?

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Mine / Yours

Why must I feel numb, done what I've done
I've taken my cues, what I'm supposed to do
Naively assume the narrative's doomed
When I hold the pen, it's throttling you

You never liked me when drunk
I start to believe you never liked me at all
And so I agree, and I'll say "F*ck you"
'Cause I know if I don't, I'll probably say
Something stupid and true

I stand just out of reach of your fists
And take myself away, a gangrenous limb
And dance around the subject, a figure of eight
Describe all the parts of me I'm yet to break
Count all the parts of me I'm yet to break

Count all the parts of me I'm yet to break

You kiss me like it was your job
So tender and carefully, teeth before tongue (I wanna be yours)
Not in the way that the romantics do
But with the grace of a workplace HR dispute (I wanna be yours)

You know, I don't need much more
I wanna be mine, wanna be yours
You know, I don't need much more
I wanna be mine, wanna be yours

I take you for granted
Because the alternative's far more alarming

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Around The Pomegranate

Welcome me to spruce-bound Californian communes
These altruistic metaphors my brain force me to misconstrue

In my mind, I'm standing there sunkissed in June
In rapid eye moves, I fall right back to you

I don't want to go
You don't want to game
No one else can save me
There's someone in your walls
Where do you run
When there's nowhere else to turn to?
Hope you were good and watch you-

I haven't touched a bike since last year
I haven't felt the sea
It's pointless point projection
I used to paint these pictures of me

In my mind, I'm everything you said was true
In rapid eye moves, I fall right back to you

Every night I marry a different crowd
Canals of fire, when every voice sounds so loud

I just want to feel normal again
I just want to have meals with my friends
I just can't go through this again
Find my comfort in envisioning the end

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I Don't Think It Will Ever End

I don't think it will ever end

Hey guys
Do you wanna, do you wanna hear something funny? (Yeah)
So uh, I find myself in these cycles like a figure of eight
And it goes like this
I get sad (he gets sad)
And uh, I hide myself away for a bit which is, which is fine
But then in hiding myself I feel silly (he feels silly)
And um, responsively I start forcing myself to go out and interact with people again
Then in doing so, uh, I feel sad (he feels sad)
Which is not a good feeling when you're supposedly in a 'good phase'
So as almost a self-sabotage, if you will, uh
I get silly (he gets silly)
And then uh, um, I don't know

I'll write something else

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Glass Chalet

There's another one that I wrote to the tune of
Let me see how it goes

I've lost my way
And when this is done
I'm running away
And when I have gone
I'll be where I'll stay
Like a bicycle
And bright blue waves
And I'll shave my head
And forget my name

'Cause I'll kill it dead
Yes, I'll kill it dead

I'm sorry for what I was saying about you
Believe me, I'm being really serious here

I'm digging up old bones
Use a trebuchet
I'm throwing stones
From a glass chalet
Hope it comes back home
Like a boomerang
Hit my frontal lobe
See it set free
I still have hope

But I kill it dead
Yes, I kill it dead
I hope, oh

Between you and me
It sounds horrible

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Melatonin 130

The melatonin doesn't work anymore
The Valium just stops the hurt
But not the cortisol
If I can teleport from here
I'll choose the Midway Atoll
Or just the space in between your neck
Where it meets your shoulder
But just this once (but just this once)
I'd like to see the world in three-dimensions

Keep wasting 'til you're shed, we keep it simple
The breathing exercises hurt and don't do f*ck-all
He said, "The beta-blockers work, but there's a system
The anxiety's not the cause, it's just a symptom"

But I know you
I'll live with you until our bones grow old
I'll still pick you like a scab or a mole
And I'll pull you into a dive or a stall
Ain't that miserable?
Ain't that miserable?
Ain't that miserable?

Help, why the f*ck do I still self-sabotage
When I'm finally happy
Oh, oh
Woo, wa, wa, wa
Oh, hey, hey, yeah, yeah, yeah

So it turns out everyone just hopes to God you're failing
And if you claim that you eat my words
Then take this as a warning
Nothing around here f*cking works
We're just flat-out boring
We're all apes with a diary book
And corporate reads your pages

I've just been doing, like, music and stuff

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Oh Distant You

I remember it well
Smoked the last of the weed beside your armchair
Said you were tired
You said you need something, need something to hold
So I gave you my coat
You chose to lean on me, lean on me instead

(Oh, oh)
I hate the way that I talk
When the words won't give off
The kind of praise esteemed of you
And what the hell could I say
When you're two stars from grace
And the world turns for you?
I'm just saying, man
If the Lord worked oh so kindly
He could whip me up a clone of you
But I still wouldn't glance
'Cause the thought of someone further
'Cause I'd have to take a month off work
To sit down in the kitchen

And explain all our in-jokes
And teach her all our fiction
And cry with her to Wall-E
And still, I'd f*ckin' miss ya
And finally, it hit me
That I was not the fix-all
I was just the villain
And every single modicum of energy
I gave to all the little things
Compounded my placidity
And drove out all the good things
And made life, oh, so heavy
And now I can't wake up and talk to you
Oh, distant you
Oh, gorgeous you
Oh, you

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Eulogy

You linger in doorways
Uncomfortably
It seems to me that always
You're about to leave

Roll corner bedsheets off my bed
Press eyeballs up against eyelids
The problem with being f*cked like you're hated
Is it's hard not to be convinced
The diary, a eulogy of a world famous satire
Oh please, just let me live
Your fingers dig into my lap
And baptize your anger, then fall back to back

If I could rewind the time
I'd stay there in England
We'll have a glass of wine
And watch fatal car crash compilations
All I can see
Is a wasted opportunity
All I can be
Is a diagram for desperation

Want to enjoy sad music
But it's all with the same context
Words they weave and how they choose to use it
Someone else wronged the subject
I wish I'd be
The one who's hurt indignantly
But I can see
The only one who's hurt someone is me

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Dropshipped Cat Shirt

Skinny jeans on the bench press
You burn the candle at both ends
If anyone asks why, then they're not worth your time

Why am I so out of breath?
Club sandwich pressed in north end
Grittled shank on rye
A gunshot at half time

Adoration of the mystic land
The idea of me, who was that man?
A wooly picket line
Intestinal red wine
Now it's hard not to suspect
Your lying tell is bated breath
I inhale for suspense
You triggered my mammalian sighing reflex

So I take everything as a lesson
Something I trained out of myself
With mindless self-indulging confidence
Indulge me in whatever quick release I could muster
Social media, carbohydrates and cannabis, the world was my oyster
And I was the knight by which they duck
But now he's dead, he's gone
I f*cking start anew
I'm a developmental beast, wrong version of myself
Sixteen bathrooms
Sixteen bedrooms
Sixteen fridges
64-bit computers
Fifteen of them
Oh, how nice it must be
To feel so bored

I just need to find someone to tell me
I'm just tired

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The Median

Please don't ask what these words mean
Just please don't misinterpret me

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Trying Not To Think About It

You said it's over now
Not tomorrow, not the next day, not any day
You said you'd figured out what can move me
Darling, I figured that out too

Make no time for Tylenol, Salbutamol
F*ck my life, you cared when I was sick
No one ever gave a shit
You said you gave the world, I took it all
You fought this war once I had asked me
"What am I doing this for?"

It should've been you
Well now it's you

Never been the one for romance
Never thought that I'd get married
Never been the kind to give a shared life a second glance
Selfish prose, a lifestyle of a stained-glass window
Wonder what colors and shapes I'll throw
I look to the horizon
And all I ever saw was a background for my phone

It should've been you
A constant and the undiscovered you
Well now it's you
What a perfect time for realization

I'll wake up early
I'll watch the sunrise
I never liked the rain
But sunshine hasn't worked its charms of late
Call my mother, tell her I love her
You know I never had the guts to say
"I'll dream of summer, I'll dream of you and me
In that Coyote, lying out in the shade"
Just tell me one thing
When your heart finds it's place just take a step back and smile
When you're sat in a better place

We could've kicked my ass together
We could've slapped my face together
We could've stitched my mind together
If only I knew what to say
We could've kicked my ass together
We could've slapped my face together
We could've stitched my mind together
So this is how I lose you

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10 Week Rule

Tell me what happened
Did the love lust leave your life?
Did you start thinking ways to fill the void
Replaced with endless scrolling spite
And if you look out the window
Do you see the big wider world?
Or is it just another tissue paper
Fragile painting of the Earth?

I'm gonna get an abortion
I'm gonna lose my mind
In about ten weeks from now
You'll forget me

Tell me, how you're doing?
Was it a casual oversight?
That led you to the point, do you figure
You were put here just to die?
Waiting for the firing squad
You're quaking at the knees
Praying to any God who'll listen
You get your vitamin D, oh

I'm gonna get an abortion
I'm gonna lose my mind
In about ten weeks from now
It will all be fine