Yung Delirious - Reasons (feat. Nicole Cross) Lyrics

Circles and cycles and seasons, for everything there's always reasons
But it's never good, never turns out as it should
No one ever held you, no single moment of truth
But if you were mine I would've looked into those eyes and said...
Look
I'm walkin' down this road but I'm moving so slow
Man it feels like I'm a toad
I try to make these moves but none of them are bold
What if I told you that I threw in all my cards to fold?
I didn't... but I feel like I'll consider it 'cause all the shit it's done for me has been so inconsiderate
The phase I'm in right now, I never meant to enter it
Sometimes I wish I could go back and delete this for my betterment
I've been at the point where I couldn't cry myself to sleep
I heard that's a release, but a tear I couldn't seep
It feels like I'm drowning 'cause these waters run deep
And I'm trying to swim but it's sure not up to me
I sit down and think about it
My life sucks
I'm stuck on the same girl
Yeah that's tough
And I'm chasing down this dream
And if I don't succeed
I'll be making f*cking tacos 'til I'm over sixty three
Yeah that's heavy, a heavy cross to bear
Jesus really suffered but I feel like I'm right there
Maybe it's my sin to cover up these lies
Hide behind a smile so the sadness multiplies
I'm filled with so much doubt
What if I never make it?
What if I bear it all and never find someone to take it?
The angel who's always been there for me, what if she's the devil?
And she's lowkey keeping me from reaching all these higher levels?
I don't even know who I am
Maybe I should listen to the signs
As i pick up the pen
Are these my last lines?
Circles and cycles and seasons, for everything there's always reasons
But it's never good, never turns out as it should
No one ever held you, no single moment of truth
But if you were mine I would've looked into those eyes and said...
I don't wanna do this anymore I'm really done with rapping this
'Cause lately I ain't felt I just wanna feel happiness
That you can't provide, you never really have
All you've done is leave me broke and said "oh well" at that
Everything I love just hurts me God please tell me why!
I've been searchin' for these answers that I never seem to find
And I can't begin a journey if I've got nowhere to climb
But I can't go on in life without music by my side
What else could I pursue? I suck at it all
I lack common sense and I'm really 'bout to fall
Something is telling me that I need to give more
But honestly man music is all I live for
But I can't do it alone, I'm sick of saying "new year"
Nobody on my team ever since I moved here
Nobody's really true that's all it proves
"I'll always be here for you Jason" but That's all a ruse
I've been living on a floor
I've got no money anymore
I've broken hearts across the board
Broke mine too inside it's core
So I add up all the scores you don't compare to the whores
My heart's seepin' out it's pores as I spill the drinks I pour
The drinks I took to get over you
The girls I f*cked with that stayed over too
She told me she loved me I didn't know what to say
'Cause truly I'm numb to every girl besides you anyways
I just walked to work I guess I really need this
My shoulders f*ckin' hurt, my heart is still in pieces
I haven't been to church because I'm busy dreamin'
In sin I've been immersed, please forgive me Jesus