[FRITZ, spoken]
How did we get here, anyway?
Can somebody tell me where we went wrong?
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
Brunch
That was the fatal mistake, as always
[PAUL, spoken]
No
The funeral at à La Mode
We shoulda have turned back then
[FRITZ, spoken]
Maybe if we didn't go to Zeno's...
[SOLDIER, spoken]
We met at Zeno's
[FRITZ, spoken]
I'm factoring that in
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
No, no, no, no
Coming here, to the embassy
This was the tragic error!
And you know what the ancients did in such dilemmas
They appeased the gods!
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
I'll appease the gods!
[PAUL, spoken]
But how?
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
A scapegoat must give up his own life to save the others!
I will be the victim
I will be the goat
Now, if you will excuse me to the bathroom with this pistol
Adidio!
[MARIANNE, spoken]
No, Raffiwait
Don't move
Everybody, stay exactly where you are
It's sort of wonderful
Look!
Right now we're all exactly where we were that night!
Just before we decided to stay
We're at Square One!
[COLONEL MARTIN, spoken]
What difference does any of this make?
[A sudden crash of piano keys.]
[BISHOP, spoken]
The piano! It's playing!
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Who spoke first?
Try to remember
Raffi, you said something
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
"Mimis amichichis, it has been a lovely day
And evening
But I must wish you all a fond goodnight
And for nowadidio!"
[PAUL, spoken]
"It was lovely, Raffi"
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
"Perfect! And who cares about the meal, anyway?"
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
"Your Holiness?"
[BISHOP, spoken]
"A truly joyful evening
God bless you, sir"
[MARIANNE, spoken]
"Time, Leo"
Leo, that's you
[LEO, spoken]
"Wellback to square one"
[MARIANNE, spoken]
"Oh, must he say that all the time?"
[COLONEL MARTIN, spoken]
"Back to barracks, Lieutenant"
[SOLDIER, spoken]
"Fritz? One final look at the stars?"
[FRITZ, spoken]
"If they're still there"
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Let's go! Follow me, everyone!
[LEO, spoken]
We're out!
[All of their cellphones start to ring.]
[ALL, overlapping]
Hello?...
Hello?...
Yes, hello?...
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
It's Shiva! She says the kids are okay!
[BISHOP, spoken]
A miracle! A true miracle!
[FRITZ, spoken]
I don't hear any gunshots
[PAUL, spoken]
I don't hear anything
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
Nothing
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
Nothing is fine with me
[LEO, spoken]
Did all of that really happen?
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Something must have happened
Look at us
[COLONEL MARTIN, spoken]
*Whistle*
Ladies and gentlemen
This is your Department of Homeland Security signing off
Until further notice
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
Excuse me, Colonel
"Further notice..."?
[COLONEL MARTIN, spoken]
Until further notice
Back to barracks, Lieutenant
[SOLDIER, spoken]
Listen, Fritz, I
[FRITZ, spoken]
No apologies
I was in there, too
And heyyou said you wanted real life
[COLONEL MARTIN, spoken]
On the double now, let's go!
[FRITZ, spoken]
Take care of yourself, Soldier
[The COLONEL and the SOLDIER exit.]
It's funny
I never did learn his name...
[BISHOP, spoken]
I really have to thank you all
Of course, it was pretty darn harrowing in there
But I know what I am now
[MARIANNE, spoken]
And what is that?
[BISHOP, spoken]
A priest
Just took a little practice
Go in peace, my children
[MARIANNE offers BISHOP her slippers.]
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Your Grace, a small donation
[BISHOP, spoken]
Your satin slippers?
Oh, God bless you, my child!
[BISHOP exits, tenderly holding her shoes.]
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
And Windsor, I want to say...
Where did he go?
[PAUL, spoken]
He's gone
[LEO, spoken]
Not quite
He's still out there somewhere
[MARIANNE, spoken]
But anywaywe're here
And it's a beautiful day
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
Any day would be beautiful right now
[LEO, spoken]
Okay, so
Onwards, babe?
[CLAUDIA, spoken]
Honey?
[PAUL, spoken]
You bet
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Raffi?
[RAFFAEL, spoken]
With pleasure
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Fritzie?
[FRITZ, spoken]
I don't think so
I've got a bunch of things to clean up
Like my life
Like my head
Like pretty much everything
[FRITZ exits.]
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Don't you be a stranger
[LEO, spoken]
Okay, well
Back to square one!
[FRITZ returns.]
[FRITZ, spoken]
Oh, what the hell!
La vidida ay la blah blahwhatever!
[MARIANNE, spoken]
Perfect
Now, where do we wanna eat?
[They continue along the roadbut running now, running faster and faster, amid gunshots and explosions and what seems to be the end of the world.]